Tannishblog

We’re going to win this war because I say so. We’re going to liberate Iraq because I want to. I don’t care how many troops get killed. Don’t whine at me about how many children are burned, mutilated or buried. And don’t – ever – bring up prisoner abuse again! America is right because I’m right! Anyone who says different is a communist sissy pansy-pants.

This is my plan to win the war: bomb the shit out of them. Hit urban areas with incendiaries, man the perimeter with mines and machine guns and shoot down whatever comes out. Then we move in with bulldozers and plow through the ruins so no snipers can roost, then on to the next town. Wash, Rinse. Repeat.

By the 2008 elections, the war will be won and American soldiers will come home (or as much of them as we can find), and a new, democratically elected government will be propped up, beholden to America and thankful for our part for ending the scourge of terrorism through genocide. Then they’ll be free to govern themselves – all 300 of them.

After we hire them on as outsourced Halliburton employees.